Today was a day of facing my fears of inadequacy in a situation I once not only felt comfortable in but excelled at: an academic conference. When spiritual life takes you onto paths different from mainstream academia as some one who is already a bit of an international odd ball, then what used to be a fun, mentally stimulating arena suddenly becomes the Roman Colosseum – the ancient kind with the lions and ogres!
However, as the spiritually aware person I am growing to be, I chose to notice my feelings before reacting from my gut that was still very much ruled by old and new hurtful experiences. And the result was a delightful day of supporting my friends of many years by attending their panels, going to lunch in a fun peer group with intelligent conversation that involved personal sharing instead of just shop-talk, and finally ending the day realizing that “even” the academic world has spiritually minded people whose company is truly enlightening and enjoyable.
I now see some of my friends in a different light and feel much less separated from either world or even ostracized by them. What a blessed and eventful day!