addiction, anger, bandaid, blessing, comfort, drugs, EFT, emotions, englobe.me, feelings, frustration, healing, human connection, loneliness, meditation, PPP, psychology, Ronja Vieth, sobriety, solitutde, spirituality, tapping
I just came across this article that states that “the opposite of addiction is not sobriety [but] human connection.” It introduces a book that deals with research and experiences supporting the theory that addiction is not really caused by the physical effects of chemical substances – after all, there are addictions to behaviors, such as gambling, etc. – but instead is only an alternative to human bonds.
The human being is a social animal whose need for connection and comfort may temporarily be substituted by drugs if none of those things are available. The author uses an example of the Vietnam soldiers’ addiction to heroine to call the challenging environment a rat cage that, when changed into a more nurturing one, eliminates the desire for drugs.
Several examples of rats and their environment/cages, as well as humans delineate the point made by Professor Peter Cohen that “human beings have a deep need to bond and form connections. It’s how we get our satisfaction. If we can’t connect with each other, we will connect with anything we can find — the whir of a roulette wheel or the prick of a syringe.” Although this might be a novel take on addiction from a medical / psychological point of view, it is really not so new to practitioners in the spiritual and/or healing professions.
So what if you are surrounded by family and friends and are still addicted? It has long been known that any kind of addiction only covers up a spot within ourselves that is not yet healed. The challenge, naturally, is to uncover that spot. Chemical fixes are easier but only topical solutions to a deeper-lying issue. If one is still struggling with addiction, whether it is dope, heroine, or chocolate, the true path to healing is to rip off that band-aid and clear out the wound. With this, family and friends can help by being the support system during challenging times; yet the work has to be done on one’s own.
Ultimately, healing work is a solitary task, which may also explain that some people feel extremely alone during those times. You deal with your wounds and, suddenly, no one is around anymore, because you are too emotional, difficult, or demanding. One more reason to stick to your addiction, you think? That is right, if you don’t want to change things around. And here comes the assertion that all of us at some point hate with a passion: only when you are happy within yourself will you attract people with whom to share that happiness.
Are you hating that statement right now? Great! Start your healing with that! Explore the anger and frustration that comes up with that. Let the tears roll and yourself be sad. Linger in those feelings without over-analyzing them. Explore those emotions in order to rid yourself of them and, voila, you shed another layer of pain.
Some things to try are EFT or Tapping, a guided energy meditation, or an energetic cleanse. If you cannot do those things on your own yet, look for help. Find yourself some one who guides you in meditation and intuitively knows which area wants healing right then and there, have a more general energy cleanse, or dig deep with a PPP that tackles especially sticky areas in your life. Find some one you are comfortable with or ask for referrals. A good healer should not shy away from allowing you to find the best way for you to heal, as this should be our ultimate goal for all.
So, take courage and know that connection is the key word, but remember that it starts with yourself. You must connect with yourself before you can truly connect with others. Bless yourself with health today!